Strawberry Dresses

Because we already have one daughter, I didn't need to do much in the way of shopping to prepare for little Solveig. I figured I'd have most of the things I needed to get her started at least, and I would just fill in the "holes" where needed. But every now and then when I was out shopping, something would catch my eye and I would buy it for my baby girl. Just a few special items made their way home with me, and also some essentials such as diapers and a new diaper bag.

Tonight, Erik and I decided that it was time to take stock of which items needed to be returned to the store. I just went into the nursery and melted when I came across certain things...like the "little sister" onesie and sleeper that I was looking forward to her wearing...and the "big brother" book that I had purchased for Buzz. He was so excited to be a big brother, and a good one he would be. I decided that I would keep the little sister onesie and sleeper for now, because honestly, I just couldn't part with them. Then there was the open pack of newborn size diapers that the kids and I had opened a few weeks ago, just so we could see how adorable and tiny those little covers really are. They were so excited about the diapers...so was I...

The last bag that I opened up held some adorable matching red strawberry dresses that I bought for Bug and her little sister, hoping that they would wear them later this summer and we'd find a cute green shirt for Buzz to join in on the fun. I had in my mind a very cute photo session with the three of them. And now that is not to be.

Thinking about things like the strawberry dresses, future photo sessions, growth milestones...all these things which will not be for our Solveig...these things are difficult to swallow and to accept.

Maybe there are fields of strawberries in Heaven for us to eat together...maybe she's eating some right now...I look forward to the feast there with our daughter.