Our Family

Our Family
Fall 2015 - These are my people

Tuesday, June 26, 2012

Solveig's Boxes

When we walked into our room to prepare for Solveig's delivery, the nurses directed our attention to a green box that was placed on a table just for us.  They told us that it had been made by a family like us who had gone through the loss of a child and wanted to help others.  We opened the box, and I began to weep.  Inside were several items that would become so precious to us, and included...

*A hand and/or footprint mold
*A "tress press" -  a small acrylic box that had some plates inside between which we could place Solveig's tender locks of hair.
*Some resources about grief, including a book for our children about having an angel instead of a baby

I was overwhelmed by the fact that another family had taken the time to make such a box and that we were the recipients.  The reality that we needed to receive a box like that in that moment became so intense, yet it was so comforting to have these things that would help us to remember our daughter and to make our time with her so special.

That day as we prepared for Solveig, I met Annette...the wonderful nurse/grief counselor/care coordinator at our hospital who has since become somewhat of a mentor as well as a friend - a great help in our time of need.  Annette was able to help us a little bit to prepare for what we would experience with Solveig, since she went through a similar experience years earlier.

After we had Solveig, we connected with Annette through our grief support group at the hospital, as she is the facilitator.  I asked her who makes those boxes.  She explained that different families through the years first started a fund to make the boxes possible, and then families would take on the responsibility of collecting everything to put into the boxes, creating 100 over the course of a year.  She said also that she was currently looking for someone to take on this job, and asked me if I was interested and would consider it.  I thought about it and prayed over it for a good while, asking some friends to come alongside me and pray over it as well.  Well, the long and short of it is that I could not stop thinking about the boxes and just really felt the Lord leading me to take on this new job for at least a year!  So I have done just that!!!

I'm currently in the process of gathering the items that will go in the boxes, and will be working with friends and family to compile the boxes this fall.  My goal is to have all 100 ready by Christmas, with at least the first 25 ready by early fall.  It's exciting to think about and I am so glad that we can help other families to capture special moments with their babies who will be gone all too soon.  These boxes will go to families like ours who are in the hospital for babies who will be delivered through a miscarriage, stillbirth and also those who will most likely die shortly after birth.

Soon I hope to have some type of link set up for you if you would like to donate to the cause.  There is already a fund set up through our hospital, so you can give directly to that fund.  I just need to learn the particulars of that and then I'll let you know.  And soon I'll share with you what we plan to put in the boxes.  Whether or not we decide to list the donation link here publicly, you can send me a message and I will personally let you know where to send funding.  My estimation for the cost of each box at the outset is around $50-60.  The current sample box that I have cost about $50, and that was with many things inside coming at a discounted rate.  If you'd like to support the cost of a box or donate towards it let me know!

Last night at our grief support group meeting, three couples were there to share their experiences from the past.  Two of the three couples represented have been involved in the boxes in the past, so it was really awesome to be able to personally thank them for this wonderful blessing.  In fact, the family that made the box that we received was one of those families there - that was REALLY wonderful to meet them finally.  I had for so long wanted to thank them, and it was amazing that I could do that in person.  Their story of loss and moving forward was powerful and they were so filled with hope and strength.  I appreciated their presence as well as that of the other two wonderful families who shared.

Please be praying for us as we move forward with this project.  Erik is in FULL support of me taking this on and he and I both agree it will be a very healing venture in our journey of grief.  I know Solveig would want me to help other babies...I just know it.  I think she was a very bold little girl with a lot of energy and she'd be all over this project! :)

Thanks for reading and for your encouragement.
Blessings to you all.

Linking up with Tesha's Treasures today...




3 comments:

Natasha said...

Melody,

This is such a beautiful idea! You will be such a blessing to these hurting families. We would love to donate and help out. Let us know!
Natasha

Mamascham said...

The grief program at or hospital sounds very similar to yours. The special items that were prepared in advance for us at the hospital mean so much to me. I am so thankful for the memory items the hospital gave us. It was such a blessing to receive love from another mom who understood too well the pain we were experiencing. What an incredible opportunity to be involved with this project. It is a beautiful way to honor your daughter's memory. Keep us posted on the project. I can't wait to hear more.

April said...

I love your idea and your mission. I currently make and donate Lily Wraps to our NICU and Labor and Delivery unit where I work and where I lost my sweet Lily. I am a NICU nurse and I have been thinking for a long while now to custom make our bereavement boxes. Your desire to gather items for these memory boxes has inspired me that it's my time to take the leap and begin to make our bereamvemnt boxes. Who better than Mommies like ourselves who have lived through the loss of our baby. Much love and thank you ♥